This one time, my brother and our cousin were throwing rocks at cars.... well so they said. I saw them, they had sucky aim. My brother told me you throw one. I was like no way. I'll give you a dollar. OK!!!!
I get my rock, her comes the next car down the street and the little fag in me must have thought I was a real boy. I throw the rock with all my 7 year old might and BAM!!! hit the car the first time! I never knew a green station wagon with wood paneling could stand on its nose like that!! I bet those skid marks are still on the street 30 years later!! We took off and ran like hell…right to my aunts house. We flew in the door, ran to the bedroom… What’s going on? Nothing!
DingDong!
You had better get your asses out here right now!!!
I did a lot of stupid things as a kid. One day I rode my bike in a small circle - from the sidewalk, around a tree, over the curb, into the street, up the driveway, and back again. I did it repeatedly, got dizzy and ultimately ran into the tree, then bounced off of the bike and landed on my chin in the street. I needed eight stitches.
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oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
Buttercup wrote: I did a lot of stupid things as a kid. One day I rode my bike in a small circle - from the sidewalk, around a tree, over the curb, into the street, up the driveway, and back again. I did it repeatedly, got dizzy and ultimately ran into the tree, then bounced off of the bike and landed on my chin in the street. I needed eight stitches.
I had a dirt bike as a kid. I used to do stupid stunts on it all the time. Once I wiped out, shattered my elbow, when they put a pin in my elbo, I kept playing with the pin and eventually backed it out, then couldn't get the pin back in. Had to have a second surgery. The doctor was pissed.
Buttercup wrote: I did a lot of stupid things as a kid. One day I rode my bike in a small circle - from the sidewalk, around a tree, over the curb, into the street, up the driveway, and back again. I did it repeatedly, got dizzy and ultimately ran into the tree, then bounced off of the bike and landed on my chin in the street. I needed eight stitches.
I don't think you should blame riding in circles for being dizzy
Buttercup wrote: I did a lot of stupid things as a kid. One day I rode my bike in a small circle - from the sidewalk, around a tree, over the curb, into the street, up the driveway, and back again. I did it repeatedly, got dizzy and ultimately ran into the tree, then bounced off of the bike and landed on my chin in the street. I needed eight stitches.
see? accident prone from the start
I can't even come up with anything clever to deny it.
I cracked an egg on the sidewalk one day when I heard someone say it was hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk. I sat there for a while, and was very disappointed when it just dried up.
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oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
On a 4th of July long ago my brother and his friends were in his room with his bag of fireworks. In walks USofA and sees that they are “pinching out” fuses on fire crackers. Meaning that they were lighting the fuse and pinching it out with their fingers. Here you do it… NO WAY… I’ll give you a dollar… Who can resist the I will give you a dollar line? OK!
I do it once and eehhh, that wasn’t so bad. Then my brother hands me one of these babies
NO WAY !!!!! We all did. The rest of the kids nod “yep”
OK!
OOOWWWWWWWWWW !!!!!!!! I drop it on the floor and it proceeds to start making fireworks.
My brother goes to stomp on it and I take off running crying to my mom because my fingers are burnt, his stomp was more of a kick and it went under the bed!!! Well under the bed is where everything went when we were made to clean out rooms. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP (smoke alarm) the hall is filling with smoke and my dad goes flying down the hall, kids are scattering, SQQUUUUUUSSSHHHHHH!!!!!! My dad puts the fire out with a fire extinguisher.
Mom has my hand under running water and I am crying my eyes out… Next thing I know I have a boot in my ass and I am flying across the kitchen!!
Yeah, that wasn’t so funny then, but we laugh about it now!!
I did a lot of stupid things as a kid. One day I rode my bike in a small circle - from the sidewalk, around a tree, over the curb, into the street, up the driveway, and back again. I did it repeatedly, got dizzy and ultimately ran into the tree, then bounced off of the bike and landed on my chin in the street. I needed eight stitches.
see? accident prone from the start
I can't even come up with anything clever to deny it.
I cracked an egg on the sidewalk one day when I heard someone say it was hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk. I sat there for a while, and was very disappointed when it just dried up.
Well, being the idiot I was/am, I have a million of them. Most of which no one would believe, so, I will give a simple one.
Around 15 years old, late one night, (around midnight), me and 2 good friends took a large amount of fire-works under a bridge where a set of train tracks went under. We spent an hour or so setting up 100 bottle rockets, roman candles, and other assorted “fire-and forget” projectiles.
After they were set we got behind home made “bunkers” about 15 feet from the track and waited for the next train to come. When it did we lit the fuses and sat back and watched. When the train engine got about 100 foot away from us they went off. It just seemed like a million different colors and explosions bouncing off the windshield of that engineer station. You just wouldn’t believe how loud and bright the whole thing was. Wellllllllll, no more then 100 feet passed us I think the engineer realized he wasn’t dead and SOMEHOW stopped that fucking train in 1 min with noises coming from the train that sounded like the end was coming! (Which was less time it took us to run back to our jeep and get the fuck out of there.)
To this day I would give my left nut to see what the engineers expression was!! I bet he still tells that story to this day! LOL
I was a saintly child; I didnt do anything wrong...ever.
I did not destroy others property because I am from a spare the rod spoil the child kind of family and any fun I would have would soon be forgotten once my mom found out.
Let me think a bit.....nothing really stands out. Oh yeah....
One summer, I worked as a dancer for a cable access aerobics show. My boss was friends with my brother and had modeled with my sis-in law. She had a beach house. She invited me and a friend over one weekend and forgot so when we got there; she was gone. In my deviant , innocent mind, I thought she invited us and just forgot and would not mind if we hung out while she was gone. We would wait for her....inside her house; she just forgot to leave it open for us..I looked for a key to the padlocked door. Yes, like a criminal.
In desperation to be away from rules of my own home, I wiggled my little 90 pound 16 year old body into a open screened area of the door to her upper deck.....found a key in the house she had left unlocked and unlocked the deck door to let my friend in.
Good grief.......we had a party that night, I met a 22 year old football player from Texas Tech and he didnt care that I was 17...said I looked his age. Idiot...I was still shaped like a little boy then. I still remember how he looked at me because that was the first time a man ever looked at me the way he did. Pervert. Anyway... End of that part of the story.
We partied, her neighbors called her in Houston where she was visiting people that my brother knew...(Crap). She cut her visit short, but we were gone before she got there.We had cleared out the next morning hungover and worried about the damage we caused....there were college boys sleeping on the deck..some in their underwear, some in swim trunks. I could not remember everything that I did until I got a visit from the 22 year old in the wee hours of the morning...wanting to know my address and phone # so he could call me. I told him not to...that my brothers would find him and probably gut him. I gave it to him anyway; he was so cute and so sweet. What a dummy, I was.
My mother got a phone call from my boss......shit.....our party resulted in broken china that belonged to her grandmother, broken furniture, stolen clothes, records,her stereo was broken and......I was in serious trouble. She owed me money; My mom told her to keep it and she would pay anything I owed for damages out of my allowance. Crap. I was fired and that was the end of that; I wonder if she ever told my brother......
The guy from Tech wrote me a couple of letter until my mother found one before I got to the mail one day....read it....asked me why he would sign it, Your lover, ........when I told her, "I dont know ma, I think he really likes me," she slapped me. Shit. I dont know what she told him when he called , but he never wrote me again. Oh well...
So that is my stupid kid story......
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"The life given us by nature is short; but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal." -Cicero
I was a saintly child; I didnt do anything wrong...ever.
I did not destroy others property because I am from a spare the rod spoil the child kind of family and any fun I would have would soon be forgotten once my mom found out.
Let me think a bit.....nothing really stands out. Oh yeah....
One summer, I worked as a dancer for a cable access aerobics show. My boss was friends with my brother and had modeled with my sis-in law. She had a beach house. She invited me and a friend over one weekend and forgot so when we got there; she was gone. In my deviant , innocent mind, I thought she invited us and just forgot and would not mind if we hung out while she was gone. We would wait for her....inside her house; she just forgot to leave it open for us..I looked for a key to the padlocked door. Yes, like a criminal.
In desperation to be away from rules of my own home, I wiggled my little 90 pound 16 year old body into a open screened area of the door to her upper deck.....found a key in the house she had left unlocked and unlocked the deck door to let my friend in.
Good grief.......we had a party that night, I met a 22 year old football player from Texas Tech and he didnt care that I was 17...said I looked his age. Idiot...I was still shaped like a little boy then. I still remember how he looked at me because that was the first time a man ever looked at me the way he did. Pervert. Anyway... End of that part of the story.
We partied, her neighbors called her in Houston where she was visiting people that my brother knew...(Crap). She cut her visit short, but we were gone before she got there.We had cleared out the next morning hungover and worried about the damage we caused....there were college boys sleeping on the deck..some in their underwear, some in swim trunks. I could not remember everything that I did until I got a visit from the 22 year old in the wee hours of the morning...wanting to know my address and phone # so he could call me. I told him not to...that my brothers would find him and probably gut him. I gave it to him anyway; he was so cute and so sweet. What a dummy, I was.
My mother got a phone call from my boss......shit.....our party resulted in broken china that belonged to her grandmother, broken furniture, stolen clothes, records,her stereo was broken and......I was in serious trouble. She owed me money; My mom told her to keep it and she would pay anything I owed for damages out of my allowance. Crap. I was fired and that was the end of that; I wonder if she ever told my brother......
The guy from Tech wrote me a couple of letter until my mother found one before I got to the mail one day....read it....asked me why he would sign it, Your lover, ........when I told her, "I dont know ma, I think he really likes me," she slapped me. Shit. I dont know what she told him when he called , but he never wrote me again. Oh well...
So that is my stupid kid story......
Wait, that was the best part, my peepee started tingling!
hmmmm, stupid kid stuff.........We had BB gun wars on the farm and I was shot right between the eyes (still have the scar) by my brother and as retaliation, my oldest brother held him and I shot him point blank in the ass! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, the fun we used to have!
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And your point is???? Don't have one? Well then shut up and I'll give you one!
Well this is a classic. I tied a towel around my neck, climbed on me grandma's roof and jumped into a pile of couch cushions. Needless to say, i had just watched Superman, and needless to say, i broke my leg. But it sure as hell was fun, till i realized i was gonna hit the ground........
Well this is a classic. I tied a towel around my neck, climbed on me grandma's roof and jumped into a pile of couch cushions. Needless to say, i had just watched Superman, and needless to say, i broke my leg. But it sure as hell was fun, till i realized i was gonna hit the ground........
NO!!!!! NOT THE TOWEL CAPE!!!!! That never works!!
I was perhaps 5 and in the back seat of the car (on the driver's side) when my mother was pulled over by a cop. When the officer came over to the car and was talking to her, I rolled my window down, stuck out my head, smiled and said "my daddy is a policeman, too." He smiled back and said, "He is?" My mother was embarrassed, but she didn't get a ticket. Many years later (of course this story has been re-told many times), I learned that she was pulled over for a broken tail-light and did not get a ticket.
-- Edited by Buttercup at 11:20, 2006-11-29
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oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
Well this is a classic. I tied a towel around my neck, climbed on me grandma's roof and jumped into a pile of couch cushions. Needless to say, i had just watched Superman, and needless to say, i broke my leg. But it sure as hell was fun, till i realized i was gonna hit the ground........
NO!!!!! NOT THE TOWEL CAPE!!!!! That never works!!
Uh yeah, i kinda figured that out at an early age. I was 10. And i remember it hurt really, really bad. I am still waiting for my Official Superman Cape before i try it again.