THIS is a special Star Section edition of the Drive-Thru Gourmet — because My First True Love called to tell me about a brand-new pizza.
When I was a little kid in New York, when I got home from school, I'd turn on Channel 11 and watch the Adventures of Superman. Like all my friends, I had a big-time crush on Lois Lane.
So ... this week I reached out for a Superman Pan Pizza, with Noel Neill (sigh) — who played Lois Lane on the classic old Superman — doing publicity for Papa John's Pizza.
Papa John's created the Superman Pan Pizza as a tie-in to the DVD release of Superman Returns. Buy a Papa John's pizza and get a coupon worth $3 off the DVD.
Here's the blueprint: a rectangular pan pizza with enough toppings to keep the Man of Steel leaping tall buildings with a single bound — pepperoni, Italian sausage, ham, onions, green peppers, black olives and mushrooms.
Seven toppings — no kryptonite.
Total calories: 400 (per slice); fat: 15 grams; dietary fiber: 2 grams; carbs: 39 grams. Manufacturer's suggested retail price: $12.99, plus tax and tip for the driver.
Neill played Daily Planet newspaper reporter Lois Lane in 78 episodes of Superman filmed in the '50s, and it's played forever in reruns.
I asked her in how many of those episodes were you gagged and tied up, waiting for the Man of Steel to rescue you?
"I think 79 of them," she joked. "That's all I did. Jimmy Olsen and I would get in trouble. The crooks would catch us and tie us up. Then Superman would fly in through the window and save us. You think I would have learned to be more careful."
I wasn't the only kid with a crush on Lois Lane. Generation after generation of children grew up gasping, hoping, praying for Superman to save Lois right before the last commercial.
"When I go to a Superman convention, I have everybody from small children to great-grandfathers my age (Neill is 86) come up and say they were in love with me.
"It's nice to know that so many people loved that show," Neill said.
"I loved it, too. I would have loved it more if I got residuals on the reruns and the DVD's, too, but the actors got nothing after the show ended."
They didn't get so much before it ended, either. Neill made $225 per episode. That's $225 gross.
"It was definitely gross, all right," she said.
"I remember one week when the lady came around to give us our pay envelopes. I opened mine and it was for a lot more than I usually got. I didn't remember working overtime. Then I realized that my paycheck was put in the wrong envelope. I got the paycheck meant for the man who swept up the studio every night when we were done filming. That's when I first started appreciating a union."
Her favorite episode was the one where Lois dreams she is marrying Superman.
"I'm a ham, so that was a memorable episode. But we had fun making them all, at least until we got our paychecks," she said.
Now Neill spends most of her time keeping the Adventures of Superman legacy alive. She and Jack Larson (Jimmy Olson) attend Superman conventions around the world.
Both had bit parts in Superman Returns.
"I loved Superman Returns. I thought the new Superman (Brandon Routh) was wonderful. They're making another movie, you know, and I'm supposed to be in it. But I don't know how that will be possible since my character died in Superman Returns. They're clever; they'll figure something out."
Routh was "wonderful," she said, but there will always be only one Man of Steel for her — George Reeves, the star of the Adventures of Superman.
A recent movie, Hollywoodland, investigated the circumstances of Reeves' death in 1959. It was officially ruled a suicide by gunshot, but the movie offers alternative scenarios, including murder, and presents an unflattering image of Reeves as a heavy-drinking, woman-chasing manic depressant.
"I saw that movie at the invitation of the studio, but I kept my eyes shut most of it," she said. "That wasn't the George I knew. He wasn't an alcoholic or a womanizer at all. He was the sweetest man ever, and that's why it was such a shock when he died the way he did."
Neill was in Metropolis, Ill., this week to help Papa John's debut its Superman Pan Pizza. In addition to the $3 coupon for Superman Returns, anybody who lives on a street named Lois Lane in any town in America will get a free Superman pizza.
There are 400 Lois Lanes across the U.S. Sorry, none in Houston. The closest Lois Lane I could find is in Richardson.
Tuesday, Neill ate the ceremonial first slice of Superman pizza, served in a shimmering new pizza box with Superman's picture on top. Papa John's says the pizza box will be a "collector's item" for fans.
Good grief.
"I think it's great — seven toppings, that's how Superman would order his pizza. And I deserve to eat the first piece. After all, I was Superman's girlfriend," Neill said.
Here's the blueprint: a rectangular pan pizza with enough toppings to keep the Man of Steel leaping tall buildings with a single bound — pepperoni, Italian sausage, ham, onions, green peppers, black olives and mushrooms.
Seven toppings — no kryptonite.
Total calories: 400 (per slice); fat: 15 grams; dietary fiber: 2 grams; carbs: 39 grams. Manufacturer's suggested retail price: $12.99, plus tax and tip for the driver.
Here's the blueprint: a rectangular pan pizza with enough toppings to keep the Man of Steel leaping tall buildings with a single bound — pepperoni, Italian sausage, ham, onions, green peppers, black olives and mushrooms.
Seven toppings — no kryptonite.
Total calories: 400 (per slice); fat: 15 grams; dietary fiber: 2 grams; carbs: 39 grams. Manufacturer's suggested retail price: $12.99, plus tax and tip for the driver.
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. 
